Bar None reflections

Work at Bar None is extremely tough. It’s draining, stressful, and all the counselors work incredibly long hours including many all night shifts throughout the week. And on top of that, they’re only getting paid slightly more than minimum wage. The youth residents are often rude and unappreciative of the counselor’s work. At times I wondered if I could handle working here for more than just a summer. That worry was especially strong last week when one of the main counselors (who had been here for two years) suddenly decided to quit during her shift.

Additionally, being a residential counselor at a youth mental health center is not an elite job. My years at Carleton have provided me a wealth of academic knowledge, but little of it is helpful when trying to foster relationships with troubled boys. The best counselors are those who are naturally empathetic, patient, and resilient.  The best counselors are not the “smartest” ones, but the most caring ones, and the ones who have incredible interpersonal skills. 

Despite the difficulties, I find myself enveloped in my work. It is so different than anything I have ever done at Carleton or in previous summers. It is tough in a way I have never experienced tough before, and meaningful in an entirely new way. I have been watching teenage boys struggle with their traumatic pasts and their gripping mood disorders, yet it is hopeful more often than it is hopeless. Every now and then I connect with one of the boys and while my impact is little, it is still incredibly meaningful to me.

I know that this is a population that I want to help, but I also know that while I could work as a counselor in a similar institution for a few years, I could not do it forever— it is too tough. I imagine that I could work as a counselor for a few more years after I graduate. With those experiences I would be better prepared to dive into social work policy and/or research and try to make real changes in the structure of our communities to try and help these kids. These really are the forgotten boys — the ones society has left behind. Someone needs to care for them, but its so incredibly difficult.